we need to talk about the met gala

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

I don't usually do this because there's too much of it out there already and I like pretty things too much and we all make fashion faux pas. But something needs to be said about the unusually high rate of ugly dress per minute that was seen on the red carpet on people that I love and adore and just didn't expect such low standards of style from.  The Metropolitan Museum Gala event is usually the most highly anticipated fashion event of the year but I just feel that with this years, all these people need to get their money back. I know it was a punk rock theme but Dear Beyonce, Gwynneth, Miley, January, Kim, Mary-Kate, Kerry, Elle, the list is too long, this seriously can't ever happen again: 

Bee looks like she is channeling her House of Dragon Derion days 
Kim, I have looked the other way when it comes to your generally bad pregnancy fashion but this is blinding.  I now can't see straight not because of too much of an unflattering print, but by the nerve of this dress to have attached gloves. 
Apparently January Jones is under there. I don't mind the dress so much, it's the eye make up that I cant get past 
Gwynneth I love and adore you forever but you had you giant pink dress moment when you won your oscar. This could have been in another colour. 
Alison Williams. This pic doesn't require a caption 
Ashley Green looks ten times bigger and older in these castle curtains 
In my eyes Ashley Olsen and her sister could seriously do no wrong, clearly they also caught this met fashion flu. This is not entirely bad, I get it, but something about it just doesn't seem right
You know shit is bad when Chloe Sevigny is part of this list
Diane how dare you von Furstenburg
Elizabeth Banks, where do I begin here?  
Elle, I am fanning myself just to get through the make up. But the Tie Dye?????  
Eve, I kinda expected this from you. Sorry  
Again, the make up is just too intense.  The dress is actually very nice on beutiful Ginnifer Goodwin but that make up?  
Hide it Klum, Hide it girl. 
Who is this and why is she carrying a box?  
Ivanka, your daddy is too rich 
Jessica usually looks perfect.  These spider man tights spoil this entire dress 
Kelly, I think Joan is going to get you rather. ps your date needs a hair band
Kerry I can forgive the fact that you also caught this flu, but I can't deal with those gloves and the ring on top. 
Again, someone whose style I generally admire came out looking all wrong last night. 
I don't even know who this is but this outfit is definitely the winner of this competition.  Elbows down. 
Lee lee Sobieski, love your work. Hate the floral gloves 
Lilly Collins. Wordless
Mamadonna it's time to grow old now, it's time to hand over the reigns to Lourdes
This looks like Felicia Mkhize
Mary Kate I would also be this upset 
Michelle Williams is the most adorable thing on earth. This outfit is boring and that alice band is just superfluous
Miley this dress would have been forgivable if it was not for that hair 
There are no surprises here
yo yo yo yo yo yo
Sienna got punked by her jacket
I just don't know, maybe it's not such a bad look but I could have been affected by the others and now Solange is part of this list 
Tom Brady's Jacket almost makes Giselle look amazing

THIS IS HOW A MODERN INTERPRETATION OF PUNK ROCK IS MEANT TO BE. NICOLE RICHIE LOOKS AMAZING


And the dress is Topshop

13 comments:

Aisha said...

LOL! This was hilarious, love your writing style Milli. I was also wondering what bug these celebs caught. The MET Gala always gets them dressing crazy but I agree this year's was just...no words. SMH...I still love Solange though!

wordsmakesense said...

So many bad fashion choices..lol as for nicki minaj looking like she's suffocating..

Roelof Petrus van Wyk said...

It was a PUNK theme... so you can forgive some of it..... but, sho sho sho...

Nomali said...

I even forgot some of these people were still famous. Miley's hair is the cause of this entire epidemic, I tell ya. Poor Kelly, did she forget where she works? Also, I thiught "Felicia Mkhize" was an actual person for a seconfd there.

BirdsOfAFeather said...

Mary Kate takes the cake and eats it.
Alicia though, looks like someone out of Nollywood movie.

Mavis said...
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Mavis said...

This was so funny. But you're 100% right.
All of these outfits (especially Kim K, Madonna and Beyonce)are shockingly bad.
Some of these looks don't surprise me (i'm looking at you Nicki), but others... well Kerry Washington and the Olsen's, i expected better.
These women pay stylists too much money, to leave the house looking so foolish !!!

annabelle nagy said...

Marc Jacobs tortures a young designer called Angel Barta. He's been stealing her designes for 5 years. He fooled her with love. Read the details with evidences on: http://styleangelique.blogspot.hu/2013/03/marc-jacobs-thief-of-century-who.html

Ms K said...

wow, they must have a secret bad dress contest - otherwise these outfits cannot be explained. Solange's dress wasn't that bad.

http://www.africanprintinfashion.com/

Nubian Hueman said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Nubian Hueman said...

www.nubianhueman.com

Nubian Hueman said...

I'm so amazed...all that money and all that mess. Something was definitely going around.

slomokazi said...

aaah Milli, thanks for the laugh

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